Waiting for Love

So I'm driving home from work today and I'm thinking about things. Okay I'm thinking about love. I'm a girl, give me a break. We like touchy-feely emotions. So I'm thinking about love, specifically that heterosexual kind that hopefully lasts a long time.

I'm not sure that there is a specific, fated, "one" that everyone is magically assigned to. I think that people only believe in one true love because they stop looking after they find the first. It's like people who say, I lost my keys and of course they were in the last place I looked. Well OBVIOUSLY! After you find your keys, you don't have to look any other places. So I don't think it makes much sense to say, "I found my ONE true love". You just found THAT one, and stopped looking any further after that. Tim Minchin put it very well when he said, "If I didn't have you, I would probably have someone else".

That doesn't mean I don't believe in true love. True love for me isn't about that one perfect, flawless, connection that you have to search out. It's about a love that lasts a lifetime. That lasts longer than a lifetime.

I'm not in any hurry. Because, as I said before, it's not about the perfection of the love, it's about the longevity of it.

That's what I realized today during my commute home. Why am I SEARCHING? What do I think I'm going to find him under a pile of firewood? Or behind a tool shed? This isn't an Easter egg hunt. This is love. It's a natural human faculty. If the weirdest of people can find each other... Then a lovely person like myself surely... will find... someone out there. Right?

He could be anyone. I don't have Mr. Right pictured in my mind's eye. He doesn't have a specific height, he doesn't have a specific inseam, he doesn't have a specific hair color or occupation or hobby. He doesn't necessarily like white wine over red, blackberries over blue.

Certainly there are some THINGS that I would prefer. Someone who isn't possessive or denies my individuality (look, my feminism is showing). Someone who likes to cuddle. Someone who likes... reading and watching movies. Someone who is gentle, who is caring. I mean pretty simple stuff like that. Oh and someone who thinks my feet are cute. And who doesn't mind that I eat popcorn like a crazy person. And who likes to eat tomatoes off the vine. That'd be nice.

I will admit, right now I am in love with the idea of being in love. Maybe you think I just sound like an adolescent girl. Maybe I am an adolescent girl. But here's what I think: This is proof of my healed heart. I'm not frustrated, I'm not bitter, I'm not sad, I may be a little forlorn, but I don't feel broken. I feel like a normal girl yearning for a normal boy to sweep me off my abnormally adorable feet. And that makes be happy. Feeling normal again. About love and about life.