I'll be honest, I've never written an ode. In fact, I had to wikipedia just what an ode implied. I even looked up "famous odes" on google. It seems a bit out of my league to be writing odes, and yet I find my self on the precipice of writing four. That's right, four. I promised my roommate, a guy that lives in my dorm, and the two people I spend all my time with at school that I would write an ode to them.
Ode to My Roommate
Thou art my belov'd roommate, through and through,
Who loves me and my disorganized shoes.
And the fact that I do not make my bed
Doesn't worry your cute little blonde head
You love me when I sleep through my alarm
And don't mind when I nibble on your arm
And even if you do, it doesn't keep
You from laughing when I'm falling asleep
While reading my homework. And you don't mind
If I'm messy or I'm absentminded.
You are organized and very pretty
But even though that's true, you aren't petty.
Petty and pretty don't rhyme but that's okay,
Because I know that you'll love me anyway.
You might think this ode is ridiculous
I want you to know that is obvious.
Odes are generally pretentious
Absolutely nothing rhymes with pretentious.
This ode is almost done which is helpful
Because I am done. I love you Ribbit.
Ode To the Caveman
You said you did not read my lovely blog
So I told you I would write you an ode
You live in the basement which really sucks.
I think that if I lived there I'd say "shucks"
Because it is kinda creepy down there
But you have good qualities like nice hair,
A funny sense of humor, and cute sweaters.
You give me Kit-Kats which makes you better
You eat goldfish crackers and kudos bars
I would be surprised if you were from Mars.
There is one thing about you however
I think could definitely be better.
Which that that you always seem to disappear
Which everyone in the dorm thinks is queer.
How many bank statements can one man file?
Just how many buses can one guy catch?
Is going home really that cool? Or Sequim?
Or your sisters apartment? Or your friends?
You seem very busy, but when you aren't
And have time to spare, you spend it with us.
Ode to Sexless in Seattle
You have very hilarious stories
Lunches with you are never a bore
We always complain about the weather
One could say we are birds of a feather
You are a bit of a klutz sometimes
But it is endearing and so am I
You're a vital part of the collective
Sometimes our conversations get sensitive.
We are always understanding of you
My day would not be the same without you.
You seem to be in a weird dilemma
One that I have never encountered
But I think everything will be okay.
I mean after all you are lady
You deserve the very best from your man
And I think at some point you can request
That this lull end. Until then, let him settle
Into home, you, and his new found libido.
Things will get better, until then I know
Firefox is sometimes good for that problem.
Ode to Celibate in Seattle
I know that you probably won't read this
Because it is too technological
But I am writing this ode to you cuz
I think you deserve one. You are very
Brave to claim yourself a celibate.
Even if you are lying or don't think
You can do it, you have admirable
Intentions by at least trying... I guess...
If at some point you will break your promise
It will be because you met someone
They will have to be very special
If you're lucky it will be your true love.
You have had a lot of ups and downs in love
And maybe lately, more ups then downs but
I know things will pick up eventually
You may be celibate, but someday,
Someone, will come along that changes that
If you've noticed, my rhyming has stopped.
I found your ode to be hard to rhyme.
I think it's because your ode is serious
And that I have run out of rhyming words.
Odes are harder to write then you'd think.
Those are my odes. I hope they were.... Ah, fuck it, I don't know what they were.... I hope you liked them. I guess.
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